N _ / _ E _ N / C _ T Y

playing hangman in style 

It seems our player ran out of luck. Clearly not a Glaswegian. Who can help? 

Post-War Albania

 

The Eagle & the Stag

War weary, they agreed, the three wise men,
to carve the aftermath of five grim years
between two ideologies. The Cheese,
victorious but broken, turned a palm
of supplication to the Rooster who,
to exorcise the guilt of tardiness,
gave alms, expected and received no thanks.
The Stag appointed henchmen to control
the South-West marches of his vast domain,
their brief, to quash all insurrection, more,
to regulate the people's thoughts and deeds.
The Titan tempered these extreme demands
with such humanity as might not goad
the Stag to intervene, and wisdom born
of understanding of his people's needs.
The Eagle took his mission to the heart.
He razed the holy places to the ground -
no man should harbour dreams beyond the State -
he burned the books and sealed the borders round
and in the nurseries had children sing
his praise, the only music he allowed.
He silenced or deported learned men
and turned the universities and schools
to propagandist mockeries. By these
and many other ploys he murdered hope,
destroyed imagination and laid waste
his trust, but caused no trouble to the Stag,
continuing thus for forty dismal years.
A model of beneficence, he bought
his people's gold with freshly printed notes
each worth its weight in paper, for the gold
was never seen again. The Stag received
the lion's share, while from some dark Swiss bank
the Eagle's family draws a pension still.

Dramatis personae:

The Cheese - Churchill
The Rooster - Roosevelt
The Stag - Stalin
The Titan - Tito
The Eagle - Enver Hoxha

Synesthography, anyone?

SYNESTHOGRAPHY is a new art form with very humble origins. The essence of classic photography is to focus light, and light alone, onto the film or, more often nowadays, the image sensor. In pursuit of quality, ultraviolet and infrared are filtered out, and the lens mounting and camera body are designed to resist vibration, fast temperature and humidity changes, and the ingress of dust or other airborne agents to the vicinity of the light path or sensor. One could say that the camera is very single-minded.

The synesthetic camera (synecam), on the other hand, has no such pretensions to quality. Dust and scratches on the lens ensure that wanted and unwanted light have an equal chance, while the flimsy lens mount and less than rigid camera body conspire to couple high and low audio frequencies, respectively, to the image. (The phenomenon is akin to microphony, a notorious cause of feedback in valve amplifiers). Where can such a marvel be found? On every cheap mobile phone on the market, especially earlier models such as the Motorola L6.

The Synesthographer's technique is wholly different from the photographer's. Care, precision and planning are anathematised. Spontaneity is everything. In particular, it is important not to think visually. Your synesthographs should be influenced as much by smell, taste, sound and touch as by sight. You hear a lark singing? Point the synecam any old place, and click. Remember, it doesn't have to see the lark - it can hear it, just like you, so it will feature in the final image. It only needs faith.

THE RESULTS:

It is important to remember that the camera, not necessarily the synesthographer, is synesthetic. It does all the hard work for you. But when you first look at your images, you might be disappointed. You were expecting to see the Trooping of the Colours, while at the same time hearing the horses hooves, tasting your Cadbury's 99 and feeling the sun on your shoulders. Have faith. It is all there. To the synesthete, it is a thing of beauty; to the uninitiated, a mere jumble. Now let's talk about the Emperor's new clothes.

They move among us

Anyone who has ever, even or perhaps especially when alone in the house, posed with a gun in front of a mirror should seriously consider their mental fitness to own lethal weaponry. To any such people, I ask: What facial expression did you try to adopt? Stern? Resolute? Noble? Or just hard? What childish fantasy did you conjure up, with yourself as hero, saving the world or perhaps just felling the baddies in a shower of lead?

I'd suggest that there is a fundamental difference between the psyches of the gun murderer and the suicide bomber. The suicide bomber requires anonymity up to the moment of detonation in which his own instant oblivion is assured. The gun murderer on the other hand actively desires the thrill of firing his gun, over and over, at real people. He does it for his own sick pleasure, whatever lies he might tell himself about serving a cause.